2003-01-07 - 22:28
I can't believe what I wrote in a old mail... "I wasn't a real friend but an obsessive person who needet someone to talk..... SHIT and really a big big Pity" ( second one is a Answer to that one...well, I quote only one sentence from my own mail here... Mail
from a former e-mail exchange
and which I find to be quite intresting and having many good points...I jsut would have been wise to LISTEN more to it , it did even make me have some tears in my eyes...
Hi.
I never meant to hurt you in any way. The only "threat" I ever made was to remove messages from my guestbook, and I feel I have the
right to do that, it is mine. If I ever made another, let me know, and I'll respond to it. If you feel hurt it is something you took
upon yourself, and was NOT intentionally!
Personally I think you are a little too deparate when it comes to contact with people. You just keep pushing them to write back to
you. Don't do that, I for one don't like that. Most guys don't... My suggestion is you should just chat. And don't "accuse" them of
things so that you get a reaction. Doesn't work.
About my journal (I have also written something about this on the site because you are not the only one feeling addressed in a
personal way), keep in mind that whatever is on there is a part of MY life. My thoughts, experiences, dreams, wishes, hopes, and all
more or less selected. You can't get to know me from just reading what is there, it is just a PART of me. I have a life next to this
site, and even though it isn't a nice one most of the time, it is not all posted there! But the only person who should take things
personal here is ME.
And to prevent people from finding it (people I know that is) I have decided to make it an anonimous one. "to protect the innocent"
About your guestbook. Honesty forces me to tell you I haven't visited your site very often, and when I did I probably either missed
the link to your GB, didn't feel like writing in it, or had no time. If I drop by in the future I will sign it. Promis.
What site of what American girl are we talking about here? I'm confused...
Gotta go now...
Take care!
M
< P>Hey! Thank you for your words... Don't get me wrong, I read all email I get. But sometimes I just don't have the time to respond, or am not in the mood for a loooong story. You are not the only one that is kinda behind on getting an answer from me, there are quite some emails I still have to go through. I am not worried that you will control my thoughts. In case of doubt, there is always the delete button... What I don't want however is solutions. What you read here is just a small part of me, and certainly not the whole picture. I realize I seem to be a depressed egomaniac with no self esteem on this site. The part of me that has built and still maintains the site indeed is, but the rest of me is someone else. It sucks big time, the way this guy treated you. On the other hand, if I feel harrassed by someone I react pretty rude too. I am not defending his actions here, I'm just trying to make you see why he might have done or said something... Sometimes people push way too hard for an answer. I know, I do it all the time too. This is something I really need to get a grip on for myself, I need to control this before I screw things up even more. But when it is done to me I block them out... I would like to leave with some smart words someone gave me once... You dont know what you've got, until it's gone. This is true... Take care! Sent: Tuesday, November 14, 2000 4:12 PM
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